My 40th birthday is rapidly approaching..... I only have 9 days left of being 39. I am fighting against this with my whole emotional being. I really don't wish to be 40. When I was the little kid on that stump, I never believed 40 would come. Back then being 40 was OLD!!!!!!! Of course now that I am so much closer to that age, I know that it isn't old at all. And yet.....
I don't suppose it helps much that I will be facing this milestone alone. My children will be with me but my husband, who I was counting on to make fun of this day, will be away. I am being an ADULT and facing my day without him. He is taking the opportunity to visit with his family on a suprise trip to PA. He will be gone for the entire week around my birthday. He nonchalantly announced the legnth and time of his trip to me during lunch on New Years Day. This was the perfect time to announce it since we were in public and it was a day I was bound not to have anger at him since I refuse to let my year be spent in anger at him. I am still not angry at him for this. I know that a trip to his parents is important. He needs it and so does his father. I just regret that it will be without the rest of us there.
The picture of the little girl on the stump is appropriate for this post. It was liberated (stolen) from my mother's stash of pictures while my sisters and I were trying to get a suprise video made for my mother's 60th birthday. How appropriate that it be used here when another milestone birthday approaches. I am the one at the top, my brother is in the middle and my middle sister is at the bottom. There are 2 more sisters who came along after this picture was taken.
